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Richard Best

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Tommy and Joey [Sep. 7th, 2016|05:36 pm]
Richard Best
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"Well hey, you know, you might want to take it easy with this guy"- this is my informant, thinking he's trying to help me out- "this guy, y'know, he didn't get his reputation outta a Cracker Jack box, y'know what I'm sayin'?, he earned it out on the streets."
"So you got a hard-on for 'im, Joey, or what?"
"No, no, listen, you're takin' me all wrong here-"
"So you wanna schlub for 'im."
"No, come on, Tommy-"
"You wanna pimp."
"No, man, what're you comin' down on ME for?, I'm just sayin' A, he's a hard-ass, and B, he don't trust nobody. He runs a tight operation, guys like you tend to get killed around guys like him, that's all."
"Guys like me."
"No, there you go again-"
"Joey."
"Yeah, Tommy?"
"One thing- that's MISTER O'Donnelly to you. I don't remember you gettin' on first-name basis with me."
"But-"
"No buts, Joey. Where'd I get my rep, Joey?"
"From, uh, well- you do stuff, somebody wants something, you get it done."
"You are so right, Joey. Now, is that 'out of a Cracker Jack box'?"
"No, Mr. O'Donnelly, except you know I know that ain't your name anyway."
"That's also correct, Joey. Something else that's true about that is that guys like you tend to get killed around guys like me if they can't keep their fucking mouths shut- that is to say- when they're supposed to. Or when they don't yap like they're supposed when they're supposed to. Am I not paying you well enough, Joey?"
"No, I mean, yes, yes you pay pretty good, except, y'know, I got a wife and kids-"
"And how many girlfriends?"
"I, I, I don't-"
"Joey- you've had 3 different girlfriends since you started working for me. You couldn't not mouth off a bit to any of them when they wanted to break up with ya, ya hadda start tellin' 'em stories about what a big-time gangster ya are- which ain't the case, as you well know- tryin' ta impress them, which that didn't work either, but anyway the point is, 2 of 'em I hadda buy off, and the 3rd wouldn't take, so she's gone."
"Gone?"
"Listen, Joey- did you leave me with a choice?"
"But-"
"Joey. You know what really pisses me off about this?"
"But-"
"It wasn't even my business you were blabbing to them. It was Malone's. But I want to keep this clean- even though he doesn't give a shit about that."
"But- Maureen-?"
"Joey, you're not paying attention here. Jumping to conclusions, see? I didn't say I was naming them off in order. Maureen's fine."
"But-"
"Listen. You know what I know? No, you don't, or you might be giving this speech to me, if you weren't such a fuck-up and if I was as bad off in the horny department as you. Malone really doesn't want this deal, he's going to try to run it sour on me any way he can, that's why I got you- you're my inside man. If you weren't such a fuck-up, I probably wouldn't have you in my pocket, but you are, and I do. Now you have to start being not quite so much of a fuck-up, or you're going to end up dead, I mean much sooner than anyone planned on, and it might not even be me who does it- Malone's just as likely to be the one to do it if he learns you been telling me all these juicy little stories, but-"
The door crashed open. People were shooting guns. At each other, I mean- not shooting at guns. At any rate, I was one of those people.
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